The Chronicles of two teenage pranksters
by xOxx
Summary: A battle of the sexes initiates when the schools fiery head girl gets pushed to her limits by the leader of Hogwarts' most notorious social group: 'the marauders'...Rated for content...
1. Prologue

The Chronicles of two teenage pranksters 

**Plot outline:**_ The Hogwarts community is dominated by a small group of seventh year boys dubbing themselves 'the Marauders'. With incredible cunning and wit, the boys manage to pull pranks on even the most proficient witch or wizard. Anyone who crosses them (student or teacher alike) is inevitably subjected to one of their often sinister pranks. One of these particularly nasty hoaxes, however, leads a feisty head girl to challenge the leader of the group and what initially started as a few innocent high jinks' turns into an unrestrained prank war, as a battle of the sexes ensues. _

**Rated:** _M in fanfiction ratings just to be on the safe side… because there will be sexual content later on… I don't know how graphic just yet. There will also be quite a lot of swearing in any case so yeah… you have been warned._

**Disclaimer:** _I don't own anything Harry Potter in this story._

**Info:** _This is a kind of alternate universe where James is not pursuing Lily incessantly (just girls in general). He does however find her very attractive and initially wants to use her for… umm other things. She however dislikes him to begin with as usual… their relationship becomes very interesting in this story…_

**Reviews:** _Are appreciated. How can I be sure if this story is worth pursuing if no one enjoys it or gives me any feedback at all?_

_Now onto the story…_

_

* * *

_The flickering quality of the candlelight illuminated the musty, cluttered office, as its sole occupant poured over a desk covered with several piles of parchment. The individual's severely wrinkled hands, with its conspicuous liver spots and varicose veins, grasped the thin, black quill as she scribed another unkind comment at the bottom of an essay. She gently lay down the quill, let out a yawn, and rubbed her tired grey eyes, which drooped in such a way that they resembled that of a bloodhound's. She then turned her awfully lined face to the coffee mug just inches away from her right hand and filled to the brim with warm liquid. Not being a coffee drinker herself, the beverage didn't appeal to her, but she felt it a necessity to complete the piles of N.E.W.T essays that lay sprawled on her desk. The fact of the matter was that she relished essay marking as it allowed her to get revenge on those '_little shits_' that played up in her classes all those years and who hated her so. She smiled to herself as she took a small sip from the coffee mug. 

Eager to finish the marking process, she slowly dragged the next essay to the small desk space in front of her. The quick scrawl next to the title ('**Describe the measures muggles are utilizing to conserve energy and give reasons as to why this is so important**') read _James Potter_. The old woman gave a slight smirk, remembering all those times this 'charming' young man had rebelled against her and got away with it. Without even glancing at the content of the essay, she pulled the roll of parchment through her bony fingers until she reached the bottom of the roll. She then wrote a large 'P' at the foot of the essay along with the statement '_this essay proves to me that you are completely incompetent Mr Potter. You will need to work harder to achieve a result that is of N.E.W.T standard, and I mean A LOT harder. Are you sure choosing muggle studies as an elective was a wise decision?' _

She marveled at her gutsy and nasty comment as she took another sip from her mug and set aside James's essay. As she was about to pull another piece of marking towards her to accomplish, the office door suddenly creaked open in front of her. She looked up, staring apprehensively as if an unwanted visitor was about to enter. A moment passed and no one came. She checked the clock located on the old mantelpiece behind her, which read it was half past twelve in the morning. Her cobweb-covered face was still gazing suspiciously at the open door. She finally came to the conclusion that someone had not opened the door; it must have been a breeze, the door hinges were rather old after all. She slowly made her way to the entrance and closed it gradually, hoping to prevent anyone in the castle hearing the horrible sound it issued.

As she finally closed the door, she heard a gentle tinkling of glass on glass behind her and swiftly turned around, cracking her lower back in the process. Grunting with pain and frustration in seeing that no one was there she shuffled to her seat, while rubbing her back. There, she made a decision to complete the essays the next day, as she was just too tired. She picked up the mug and drained it three quarters of the way down. Then suddenly, before she could exit the office, she started coughing and spluttering uncontrollably. She then began patting her chest. She'd forgotten how horrible coffee tasted in big gulps. She needed water, but before she could get out of her seat her head started spinning and her vision became blurred. She began panicking as she was rapidly losing consciousness. Her legs trembled as she aimed to get up, but they could no longer support her fragile form. Her head then hit the desk, the force muffled by the copious amount of essays. She had fainted. 

The moment of her collapse enticed a young man to reveal himself leaning casually against the mantelpiece behind her. He took off the cloak causing his invisibility and tilted his head as he stared down at the unconscious figure in front of him. He cautiously walked towards her, and then gave her a sharp poke in the part of her back she had injured earlier. She did not move. Seemingly satisfied, the young man in his grey track pants and black, fitted t-shirt, opened the hack sack he had brought with him to reveal several small plastic sealed bags, all filled with a white, powdery substance.

He swung his sack over his shoulder, about to plant these bags around the room, when he glanced at the woman's feeble looking expression on her face. He then let out a sigh.

"Don't look like such a bitch when you're unconscious, do you?" The young man's deep voice sounded. "I almost feel like what I'm about to do is a bit too harsh."

_Maybe this prank is a bit too cruel. Am I doing the right thing? _He thought to himself, surprised he was starting to feel guilty about his intentions (a very rare occurrence).

His eyes then darted to a long roll of parchment containing writing he recognized as his own. He saw the big red P and the unfair comment written at the bottom.

_Yep definitely doing the right thing_, he concluded.

"That at least deserved an E, you old douche bag," James sneered nastily, stuffing a couple of bags in her desk drawers.

He then opened one of these bags and emptied a small amount of the chalky matter on the desk, right near her lined face. He then retrieved a cotton bud from his pocket, wiped it in the white powder and rubbed a bit of it on the inside of her right nostril. He proceeded to plant these bags around the room; in her suitcase, in more sets of drawers and even under the cushions of the frayed lounge in the corner of the room.

"_Scourgify_!" James Potter hissed, pointing his wand at the coffee mug. The contents he had tampered with vanished and he then put the mug in the emptied hack sack.

Smirking in a self-satisfied way, James Potter covered himself with the invisibility cloak again. He then made sure he did not leave any evidence behind. Everything had gone according to plan.

"I won't be seeing you," James whispered quietly, as he exited the office and closed the door.

He arrogantly strode the length of the outside corridor, spotting the silhouette of two relatively tall people and a third who was rather squat. They were all staring down at a large map shared between the three. They all looked up. The tallest of the three gave a smirk and folded his muscular arms into his chest. He had exceptionally handsome features, with black hair that fell elegantly over his eyes and nicely tanned skin. The second tallest had sandy brown hair and was rather pale, but was still attractive in his own right. The third was short, and slightly over weight with blonde hair and watery blue eyes. His face was riddled with anticipation as he heard James's approaching footsteps.

"Did you get the job done?" the dark handsome young man asked in a low voice, already knowing the answer to the question.

"Of course I got it done, what kind of question is that?" James asked arrogantly. "Everything went smoothly up your end, Sirius?"

"Yeah, no Filch or Mrs Norris came past," the young man named Sirius replied. "What about you?"

"Yeah… I thought this one was going to be an actual challenge," James said. "It was about easy as half the fucking girls at Hogwarts."

Sirius sniggered.

The brown haired boy then cut in. "What about my sleeping draught."

"She was out cold, Remus," James smiled. "Should last till morning."

"Nice," Sirius said appreciatively.

"Well, no point standing around here then is there?" Remus said, looking down at the 'marauders map' to see if anybody was approaching them through the dark corridors.

"I agree lets go," the squat member said nervously, looking over his shoulder.

"Chicken shit," James said under his breath. "Alright Peter we're going. We'll head back to the common room."

As the group of boys walked quite casually back to their sleeping quarters, Sirius gave James and Remus a smirk and said, "hopefully we'll have that old pussy's ass kicked out of the castle."

"I did the thing pretty well you know. And if our plan goes accordingly, which it always does, she should be outta here by tomorrow afternoon," James said haughtily. He then added as an afterthought, "you know what I think?"

"What?" Remus asked.

"I think we could get any teacher out of this castle," James replied confidently.

"Except for Dumbledore and Mcgonagall, and old Sluggy's alright for a Slytherin," Sirius murmured. "Gotta respect that shit."

There was a small pause within the group.

"Do you ever think we go too far with our pranks?" Remus asked offhandedly.

"Nope," James answered firmly. "We are the fucking kings of this castle and if anyone is stupid enough to cross us, they deserve all the shit we give them."

"Shouldn't we be using our cunning for good not evil," Remus smirked.

"Nah," Sirius said. "More fun this way. Plus we gain more respect. And I have to add that there is not one chick in this castle who wouldn't fuck us."

"I'm sure there is," Remus contradicted.

"Yeah well, we'll just prank those chick to show them who the bosses are around here," Sirius replied. "Fuck us or we'll fuck you up."

James snorted patting his best friend on the back. Remus scowled. That was one thing he detested about his two best friends: the disrespect they had for girls. Well they pretty much disrespected most people, but females were one of their main targets for their unfortunate contempt. However Remus did have to agree with James and Sirius on two accounts. Metaphorically speaking they were the kings of other students and were either feared or idolized, but mostly the latter. It was also true that girls did tend to disregard their own rights while around the marauders, in the hopes they'd be able to achieve even one night of 'affection' from one of the boys. However, he could think of at least one girl who did not find the marauder boys appealing, and she came in the form of a pretty and _respectful_ red head named Lily Evans.

* * *

_So that's the end of the prologue. Yes it is quite short and quite boring, but it's not an actual chapter…its purpose was to establish the characters and show you how far they go with their pranks. I generally write long chapters so don't worry… the story hasn't even begun yet. You'll probably notice the marauders are pretty disrespectful and cruel as well…but there is more character development to come, so don't worry. James will find his soft spot for Lily… lol_

_So read and review…if no one enjoys it I'll probably remove it and do some editing to improve it but yes give me your feedback…)_


	2. Chapter 1: Arrested development

The Chronicles of two teenage pranksters 

**Plot outline:**_ The Hogwarts community is dominated by a small group of seventh year boys dubbing themselves 'the Marauders'. With incredible cunning and wit, the boys manage to pull pranks on even the most proficient witch or wizard. Anyone who crosses them (student or teacher alike) is inevitably subjected to one of their often sinister pranks. One of these particularly nasty hoaxes, however, leads a feisty head girl to challenge the leader of the group and what initially started as a few innocent high jinks' turns into an unrestrained prank war, as a battle of the sexes ensues. _

**Disclaimer:** _I don't own anything Harry Potter in this story._

**Reviewers:** _Thanks to the people who gave me feedback. That was just the prologue establishing the characters and yes it probably was a bit odd, but I thought it would give you a good idea of how 'harsh' the marauders are in this story…You will probably like this chapter a lot more because more characters are introduced like Lily of course and it hopefully explains the prologue a bit more…So please keep reviewing I want to see if this story is worth pursuing…_

_Enjoy ) …_

The refreshing morning light flooded the interior of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, as another warm Autumn day commenced. The inhabitants of the prestigious school were at that moment congregated in the large dining chamber known as the Great Hall. The scraping of cutlery and chattering voices echoed in the large room, as the students sat at their respective house tables enjoying their breakfast. The ambiance was surprisingly cheerful. Nothing about that sunny morning indicated anything out of the ordinary was occurring inside the castle, except of course the absence of the headmaster Albus Dumbledore from his usual throne at the middle of the staff table.

"Wonder where old Dumbledore's got to," Sirius said, leaning back in his bench slightly, as he scanned the front table. "It's not often he disappears at meal times."

James took a large bite out of his bacon sandwhich, smothered with barbecue sauce, before shrugging his indifference.

"I have a hunch," Remus said.

"Here we go," Sirius said, rolling his eyes. "Enlighten us Moony."

Remus furrowed his eyebrows at Sirius. "Well … don't you think he probably found Miss Marsden's 'stash'?"

"Already?" James said, raising his eyebrows. "We haven't even finished breakfast yet."

"Then how do you explain the fact that Miss Marsdon is missing from the staff table as well?" Remus asked matter-of-factly.

"I put your sleeping draught in her coffee. She would still be out cold."

"I don't think I made it _that_ strong, did I?" Remus asked in concern.

"You underestimate your potion making abilities too much Moony. Doesn't he Peter?" James said, nudging the more introverted member of the group to join the conversation.

"Yes, you are a very good potion maker," Peter stated, nodding his agreement.

"Thanks, but you do realize if I made it too strong, she could probably die or go into an irreversible coma," Remus added.

"Even better," Sirius smirked. "Man, if that were the case Remus you'd be my fucking hero."

"Wonder when she'll get the sack," James speculated aloud.

"Care to bet on it?" Sirius asked.

"You're on. Five galleons says she's gone by lunch time," James said.

"Five galleons? That's soft man. How about ten?"

"Deal," James said, as the two boys clasped their hands together as a way of finalizing the agreement.

"I'm so going to win," Sirius said cockily. "He's at least going to let her explain herself before he kicks her ass out."

"You think?"

"It's Dumbledore. He is a prime believer in second chances," Sirius said. "I'm living proof of that, after all the times he's let me off the hook. So I hope you savor the time you have left with those ten galleons because you won't be seeing them ever ag-"

At that moment, Sirius's sentence was intercepted by a horrible screech, which reverberated off the walls in the Great Hall and drowned out all other sounds. Every single head in the room turned towards the entrance of the hall, beyond which was the source of the atrocious noise.

"What were you saying Padfoot?" James grinned in a satisfied way.

"No fucking way," Sirius said in awe. "It can't be."

"You don't think it's that do you?" Remus asked.

"Well boys, should we go check it out?" James asked, a very pleased expression plastered on his face.

"Yes!" Sirius said eagerly. "There's no way it is her though."

"We'll just have to go and see, won't we?" James said, rising from his seat.

The other three Marauders followed suite, sliding from their benches and making their way towards the exit. Their fellow students watched them intently, before rushing from their seats also to unearth the source of the commotion in the Entrance Hall.

The marauders sprinted out of the Great Hall to find the situation a lot more severe then they had initially thought. Miss Marsdon, the extremely old and frail muggle studies teachers, was struggling between two men wearing very official looking robes, velvety blue in color. A third man, clad in the same robes, was immersed in critical conversation with none other than Albus Dumbledore at the foot of the Grand Staircase, draped in violet robes with silver stars. The man Dumbledore was conversing with had a large bag slung over his shoulder, as he exhibited the contents to him.

Hundreds of students spilled into the Entrance Hall soon after, gradually forming a ring around the tiny woman vigorously flailing, attempting to throw her rather bulky captors off of her as she screamed in futility.

"I DIDN'T DO IT!" She cried. "I SWEAR THEY AREN'T MINE! I'VE BEEN FRAMED! WHY DON'T YOU BELIEVE ME? DUMBLEDORE P-PLEASE TELL THEM! I WOULDN'T – I NEVER!" 

The woman began sobbing uncontrollably between her captors, whilst utilizing fresh attempts to get rid of the two men. Many of the students in the large circle were shaking with laughter at the situation, having harnessed a strong dislike for the old woman. Many others were contemplating why these formal looking men were manhandling Miss Marsdon. A few first year girls looked frightened by the scene. The marauders however stood impressively amidst the chaos with extremely smug expressions on their face, as they watched the repercussions of their nighttime prank.

"I guess neither of you won the bet," Remus smirked. "She didn't get the sack. We got her arrested instead."

"This is one of the best days of my whole fucking life," Sirius said, grinning ear to ear.

"Oh look, Dumbledore and that man have finished their conversation," Peter said excitedly.

Indeed, Dumbledore and the man in blue robes had ended their grave discussion, and began walking towards the troubled muggle studies professor.

"Agatha Marsdon?" The man enquired assertively, as he stood before the spluttering old woman. "You are now in Ministry of Magic custody for the possession of an illicit substance. You will be sent straight to Azkaban to await your trial. There, your long term punishment will be determined."

"No, no, please they weren't mine!" Agatha groaned, tears pouring from her wrinkled eyes. "They must've been planted when I fell asleep last night."

"We found no evidence of any kind to support your plea. The caretaker, Argus Filch, did not meet anybody in the corridors last night that could have had a hand in framing you," the man replied unkindly. He then faced the two men restraining her. "Get her out of here."

The two men forced Agatha forwards, triggering her fresh attempts to escape. As she was quite literally carried across the Great Hall she caught the eye of the conniving James Potter, with his arms folded comfortably into his chest, and a lopsided smirk across his handsome face. He gave a wink and a small wave, as she shot daggers at him. His trivial act of arrogance influenced her to start screaming aloud again.

"THAT LITTLE BASTARD OVER THERE FRAMED ME! LOOK AT HIM! HE HATES ME! HE WOULD DO ANYTHING TO GET ME OUT OF HERE!" The old woman screamed hysterically. "IT WAS JAMES POTTER. PLEASE LET ME GO! QUESTION HIM! HE DID IT! PLEASE? I BEG YOU! IT WAS JAMES POTTER AND HIS STUPID FRIENDS! GET YOUR HANDS OFF ME!"

Her screams of accusation slowly faded, as she was forced across the hall and out into Hogwarts' grounds. The students stood in shock, marveling at the astonishing turn of events they had all witnessed. After a few moments of almost complete silence, broken by a few whispers, the bell rang for the first lesson of the day. It was hard to believe that they all had a normal day of classes ahead of them, after that fascinating scene they had just observed. Some of the crowd moved off to first period, however most of the party remained behind, wanting to see more. Unfortunately the throng was forced to dispatch as Professor Mcgonagall came through with a very grave tone, telling everyone to get to class.

"Well boys, I say we've really out done ourselves as far as pranking goes," James grinned, as the group made their way to charms.

"This calls for celebration," Sirius said. "I still have some grog I snuck from last Hogsmeade visit. We'll drink to another great victory tonight."

"It's Wednesday, we have school tomorrow," Remus said.

"When has that ever stopped us before?" Sirius asked. "Besides, we deserve it for all our efforts getting that old bitch arrested. And might I emphasize the word arrested, not just sacked, _arrested_!"

Remus considered Sirius' words for a moment. "Good point," he nodded in agreement.

* * *

"The general standard for this week's essay was poor," Professor Mcgonagall said gravely. "I would have expected a lot better from my N.E.W.T class. If you want to achieve a result, signifying you are competent in this course, then you must work a considerable amount harder than you have been over the past four weeks. I am extremely disappointed. Which is why I am making all of you who did not scrape at least an acceptable in the essay, rewrite it. That means that Mr Lupin, Mr Potter, Miss Evans, Miss Wells, Mr Snape and Mr O'Connell are exempt from the task."

Most members of the class let out a groan, causing Mcgonagall's eyebrows to contract as she scowled. "You have nobody to blame but yourselves. Now hopefully you will learn for future assignments that I do not accept poor results in my class. I know you all can do a lot better. I shall hand them all back now. I have written comments at the bottom informing you where you went wrong."

The exciting events of that morning seemed to evaporate from everyone's minds as they got handed their marked essays. There was an air of disappointment in the classroom as the students collected their work; most people receiving a disapproving look from Mcgonagall.

"Very well done Miss Evans," Mcgonagall said, giving a rare smile. "One of the few to actually achieve an adequate result. And you too Miss Wells."

Mcgonagall handed two essays to a girl with dark red hair and her neighbor. A girl on the red head's right received her essay with no praise but a hard, stern look from Mcgonagall. She looked down at her essay and saw a large letter D at the bottom.

"That is so fucked up," the girl sighed, running one hand through her very long black ponytail.

"Well what did you expect, you rushed it the night before?" Lily Evans asked.

"Well, I've been very busy lately," she replied.

"Doing what?" the blonde girl asked.

"My boyfriend," she stated simply.

The two girls snorted. "Of course you have, Gina," Lily sighed. "But don't you think you should maybe prioritize this year. You know allocate time for your studies and then make time for your boyfriend as well."

"Hmm … good idea and all Lily, but I think I'll just keep doing things my way," Gina said calmly.

"Fine, just don't complain to us when you don't get a good result," Lily said. "Me and Krystal will just keep kicking ass, while you keep falling on yours."

"Exactly," the girl named Krystal smirked.

"Well I guess since you girls will be too busy studying, you won't get to come to my awesome party," Gina said mockingly.

"You mean the one you've been organizing for over sixth months?" Lily asked with raised eyebrows.

"Yep, that's the one."

"Well we'll probably be on our death beds by the time you throw it, and not so much in the partying mood," Lily smirked.

"Hey, parties which aren't really planned are usually shit anyway. You just wait you'll be eating your words," Gina said smugly.

"Course I will," Lily smirked.

A snort resounded through the classroom. Lily turned in her seat to see the three marauders (Peter not having made it into N.E.W.T transfiguration) laughing as they read through an essay between them.

"What happened Padfoot?" James sniggered. "I thought you were smart."

"Look, we've had a lot of homework lately. My effort on this one kind of half assed."

"That much is obvious," Remus chuckled.

Lily rolled her eyes, as she slid around in her chair to face the front. Lily was not one to dislike someone unless she had valid reason to. The marauders were an exception. Despite their conniving attitudes, their arrogance, womanizing tendencies, obvious contempt for most people and pretentious personas, they had never done anything to directly affect her. These however, were not the reasons for her dislike. The real logic behind her loathing came in the form of their pranks. In the whole student body, there was no group as cunning and manipulative as the marauders. It was ironic how everyone knew that when a cruel hoax occurred in Hogwarts the marauders were always behind it, and yet they always got away with it. They were notorious for their pranking abilities. Even the teachers knew of their reputation, but failed to prove their guilt when it came to their pranks. Sometimes Lily thought that certain teachers didn't care so much about their reputations, as the three marauders could be very charming when they needed to be. Lily referred to James, Sirius and Remus as the triple threat, whilst Peter was the tag along.

You had James, the ringleader of his little posse. Athletic, talented, handsome but exceedingly arrogant, Lily disliked him for forming the marauders group and most likely initiating their pranking ways. He had a mop of jet-black hair, which was untamable and unkempt, a chiseled jaw, hazel eyes, a cocky grin that made most girls swoon and a very toned figure attributed to him from his Quidditch training. Sirius, was similar to James in his personality, only real difference being he was surprisingly more conceited yet had lower standards when it came to the girls he slept with. He was, if possible, even more womanizing than James, having bedded most of the girls at Hogwarts. He had many conquests and was someone who found girls with boyfriends very appealing. He had olive skin with black hair, which reached half way down his neck. His long fringe fell elegantly over his eyes. He was also a similar build to James; just slightly shorter, standing at 6'1 while James was around 6'2. Remus had sandy brown hair and stood at 5'9. He was the probably the most down to earth member of the group and was also the brainiest. He was what girls would describe as 'cute' and hadn't had nearly as many conquests as James and Sirius, which is why Lily liked him the most. Lily could not quite comprehend why Peter was a member of that group. He was a short, squat virgin with blonde hair and watery blue eyes that basked in the glory of the rest of the group, while having done barely any of the work. She however, did not hate him.

The group as a whole was probably the most dislikable group in all of Hogwarts, and yet their popularity had skyrocketed. Maybe it had to do with the fact whoever was stupid enough to piss them off, became targets for their next prank. The severity of the hoax varied depending on how much a person managed to annoy them. The fact of the matter was, all students treaded on eggshells around the marauders to avoid getting on their 'list', all students except Lily Evans. That's not to say she would intentionally cross paths with one of the marauders. Just because she wasn't afraid of them didn't mean she was stupid. No, she just tried to ignore them as best she could, which was proving to be hard at that point in time because the leader of the group was head boy and she was head girl. Lily's thoughts were brought to a close as her name resonated in her ear.

"Lily?" a males voice sounded. "Lily?"

Lily looked up into the face of a very cute boy with spiky, brown highlighted hair. A smirk played across his slightly freckly face as leaned towards her from the table in front. "Were you daydreaming or something? Who were you thinking about?"

"Nobody special," Lily smirked. "How'd you go in your essay anyway? Good I guess since you don't have to rewrite it."

"Ooh changing the subject, are we?" Rueben mocked. "Nah, I did alright. Exceeds expectations."

"Same!" Lily said excitedly. Rueben laughed at her exhilaration. "So I haven't seen you all day. It sucks we aren't charms buddies anymore. God third year was great."

Lily smiled. "I know ay. I remember the days when we used to be so immature."

"Used to be? Please you act exactly the same to me."

Lily jokingly presented Rueben with a rude hand gesture for his comment. He laughed returning the favor. Rueben was a smart, good looking Ravenclaw, as well as a loyal, caring friend of Lily's. They met in third year when they were paired up for a charms assignment and had been friends ever since. They actually dated in fourth year but broke it off after a short while, mutually deciding their relationship was more enjoyable when they were just friends.

"It's so weird about Professor Marsdon this morning huh?" Rueben said.

"Yeah I know, I wonder what she did to get herself arrested," Lily said wonderingly. "I never imagined her as a criminal. You would think the teachers would at least explain to us what had happened."

"I know. But all gossip gets around in this castle. We'll find out soon enough," Rueben replied.

At that moment, the classroom door burst open, cutting the exchanging of results short. A fifth year girl with curly brown hair entered, looking nervous.

"Yes?" Mcgonagall asked.

"Um… I've been sent around to give a message to the head boy and girl and all prefects. Uh Professor Dumbledore is having a meeting in his office," she said timidly.

"Very well. Mr Potter, Miss Evans, and the prefects in this class may leave and Black you are not a prefect so you will remain in your seat," Mcgonagall said firmly. Sirius sneered as he leant back in his chair.

James, Lily, Remus, Rueben and a couple of others ascended from their chairs and followed the young girl out of the classroom.

"Did Dumbledore tell you what the meeting was about?" Rueben asked the young girl.

"No, he just sent a note to Flitwick to tell us to meet him in his office, then he told me to collect all of you in transfiguration," the girl replied shyly, obviously daunted by the presence of a group of seventh years. Lily gave her a friendly smile, hoping to make her more comfortable. However the small girl looked even more intimidated.

"It's pretty obvious what it's about," the Slytherin prefect Avery sneered. "It's about that old professor's arrest this morning."

"Do we look fucking stupid? 'Course we all knew it was about that," James spat nastily.

"Jelly slugs," the fifth year girl said quickly, attempting to impede the looming fight as the crowd approached the statue leading to the headmaster's office. The statue sprang to life at these words and leapt aside. The group then stepped onto the continually escalating spiral staircase, which took them to the impressive wooden door with the griffin knocker.

James stepped ahead of the group and rapped on the door twice. Dumbledore's voices answered and invited them inside his beautifully round and exceptionally fascinating office, abundant with noisy silver contraptions.

"Ah yes all of you come in and sit down. Hopefully I conjured enough chairs for you all," Dumbledore said pleasantly.

The group of seventh year prefects moved to join their fellows in the cushioned chairs that formed a ring with the headmaster's desk. They all looked expectantly at Dumbledore as he put the tips of his long, thin fingers together. His twinkling blue eyes scrutinized the surrounding group before voicing his intentions for the meeting.

"I'm sure you're all wondering why I brought you into my office today. I am equally sure that you all witnessed the very disappointing event that took place in the entrance hall this morning, the one that disrupted your breakfasts."

Many of the prefects nodded, including Lily.

"I think it only fair that I inform you all of the situation before I ask this favor of you. Your previous muggle studies teacher, Agatha Marsdon, was found in the possession of about twenty bags of powdered Chimaera eggs. If any of you don't already know that is in ministry's top ten list of non tradable substances," Dumbledore stated grimly. "As I went into her office this morning to see why she had not joined the staff for breakfast I found her passed out on her desk. All of the evidence points to the conclusion that she had been abusing the substance last night, causing her to lose consciousness. I alerted the ministry, knowing it was the right thing to do. I needed the substance out of my school, not wanting to risk one of the students finding it. Members from the magical law enforcement squad were dispatched to the school, confiscated the substance, revived Miss Marsdon and put her under arrest."

The group sat in silence at the shocking news. James' face remained passive. He was careful not to look Dumbledore in the eye. He turned his head away to find the Lily was staring at him, a scowl playing across her pretty face. He cocked an eyebrow at her. Her glare became more severe before she turned back to face Dumbledore. James had no time to ponder Lily's behavior towards him as the headmaster began speaking again.

"I have received complaints over the years, stating that Agatha's teaching style was strongly based around favoritism, and I spoke to her many times. I did not however, believe her to ever be someone who would abuse illegal substances," Dumbledore stated disappointedly. "Now, you have been informed of the situation. The culprit has been apprehended. I must now ask a huge favor of you all. I want you to keep an eye on any students who may have –er came into contact with this substance or who Agatha may have offered some to. It is very important that we make sure no students will ever have access to the compound again. It is extremely dangerous. We removed all bags from her office but I'm having you do this as an extra precaution. I do not want any students exposed to the stuff. There's a good chance no students would have had contact with it because I was in her office only a week ago and there were no signs of the matter at that point, which means she would only have acquired it within the last few days. So do you think you could perform such a service for me?"

The group nodded their ascent in unison, some quite unenthusiastically. "Excellent, well I won't keep you from your lessons any longer. Of course there is only about a minute left of this period, so you of course have my permission to begin your lunch break early if you wish."

An air of relief swept the room, as the group began making their way towards the exit. Dumbledore saw that Lily and James were the last of the departing group and decided to call them back.

"Ah, Miss Evans, Mr Potter. I apologize for delaying your leisure time but would you mind if I have a quick word with the both of you?"

James wanted to rush out of the office as quickly as possible, but hoped his eagerness to leave did not show on his face. Lily on the other hand walked back towards Dumbledore's desk without hesitation. James glimpsed at the door, only to see Remus standing there, along with Lily's friend Rueben. Suddenly, the bell sounded, the loud ringing filling the large room.

"I'll catch up with you soon Remus, just go ahead," James said to his friend, while giving him a look that plainly said he did not want to stay in the office.

Remus nodded and exited the office. Lily waved to Rueben, signaling she would do the same. He followed Remus.

"As I allocated you the positions of Head boy and girl, I obviously trust you both. Just make sure if you see a student acting suspicious, you report it. I don't know how the substance got into the castle. I know that Professor Slughorn keep chimaera eggs in his private stores, but that is always kept protected by very reliable magic. The best I can do is tighten security on any owl post deliveries and of course make sure no students come into possession of the material," Dumbledore sighed. "Well, I suppose that is all for now. Inform me of any strange occurrences inside the castle. I will hold another prefect meeting next week to perhaps rearrange the duties carried out. And yes I think that is all … unless either of you have anything to add, any suggestions? Anything at all?"

"No sir," Lily said. James shook his head.

"Very well, you both may go."

Lily and James both left the office, Lily walking slightly ahead of James. He rushed to remain level with her, before she could rush away to her friends. A few last minute stragglers were the only people who occupied the corridor as the Head boy and girl walked out of the office. Lily watched them turn left around the corner at the far end of the moderately long corridor, before moving to do the same. She walked determinately forwards, eager to get away from James's presence. James brow furrowed as he followed her.

"Wow that's it?" James said incredulously. "We are going to be working together for the next year and your not even going to talk to me?"

Lily stopped in her tracks and slowly turned on her heel to face James. "What, so just because we have duties together about once every what, two months, we have to become friendly towards each other? I don't like you and you don't like me, so lets not even pretend, it'll make things so much easier."

James looked at Lily disbelievingly. He was momentarily speechless. Lily used his silence as an opportunity to escape.

"Wait a minute!" James said in frustration, chasing after the red head. "When have I given you any indication that I hate you? And you disliking me is kind of news to me too."

"Think back to all those years you embarrassed me in class. Remember that time in third year in potions where you poured water all down my front and made my white school shirt go see through, coz I sure do? Or that time you cursed me from behind, making me fall into the lake?"

"Hey that curse wasn't meant for you!" James said forcefully. "Look I know I was a little prick when I was younger, but you'd be surprised to know that I changed in those years between now and then."

"Yeah, you got worse," Lily said nastily, before trying yet again to relieve herself of James' company, only to find her path blocked by his muscular arm, as he leant it against the wall.

"How am I worse?" James asked in frustration.

"Well let's see, you even more egotistical, you're womanizing having slept with half the female population of Hogwarts, you're pretentious, conniving, intimidate people who are weaker than you, look down on people, you walk around like you own the castle, not to mention you're one of the biggest _assholes_ I've ever had the displeasure of meeting," Lily said boldly. "And you also think you are so funny pulling all those pranks on people, but I think it is a really petty, fucked up way of making people fear you."

James looked down into the beautiful emerald green eyes of this fiery young girl. Her dark red hair seemed to sizzle as she spoke of the reasoning behind her dislike for James. That was another feature that added to her attractiveness; her hair. It was currently tied up in a messy high pony. Her fringe was pulled into a small quiff on top of her head, and away from her pretty, slightly tanned faced. All James felt like doing was causing her more frustration, so he leant in closer to her. He towered over her 5'5 frame, so it was easy for him to see down her surprisingly low cut robes, and also down the beautifully fitted school shirt underneath. He stared down at her exposed cleavage, wanting nothing more than to rip her shirt off to shut her up. Lily however aggressively pushed him away, in frustration, realizing what he was doing.

"You are such an asshole," Lily breathed.

"I'm the asshole?" James asked with indignation. "You're the one who's all of a sudden bad mouthing me, when all I wanted was to start a friendly conversation. Then you go ahead and push me for no reason."

"Oh please James, don't even try to pretend all those things I said aren't true," Lily said angrily.

"So the truth comes out. You really think all those things of me?"

"Yes, and don't think you can scare me with stupid threats to prank me. I'm not afraid of you," Lily said.

"You have no reason to be. But that can change if you don't stop being a bitch," James said ominously.

"What ever," Lily said rolling her eyes, as she ducked under his arm.

"It's not like you can avoid me Evans, Dumbledore will expect us to make sure that old bitch didn't give any of the drug to kids," James called after her.

"Oh yeah, about that. Do you really expect me to believe that Miss Marsdon turned out to be a drug dealer?" Lily replied. "You may have fooled everyone, including Dumbledore, but I'm not stupid James. I know that was another one of your nasty pranks."

"Care to prove it?" James smirked. "Besides, are you actually sorry that corrupted old bitch is gone?"

"Goodbye James," Lily waved, turning away from him.

"Bitch," James murmured under his breath before taking a different route down to the Great Hall.

* * *

The dormitory that night was devoted to celebrating the marauders victory over the disreputably disliked teacher Miss Marsdon. Three bottles of fire whiskey were being passed around between the four boys as they talked, laughed and reminisced their most infamous pranks and conquests.

"Yep, we've definitely raised the pranking bar with this one," Sirius said triumphantly. "It's going to take a lot of skill plus a lot of balls to beat it!"

"Fuck yes!" James agreed.

"I'm sure we'll be able to do it," Remus added, as he took a large gulp from the bottle.

"Course we will, because we are the fucking best!" James said.

"You know what?" Sirius exclaimed suddenly. "We should so invite the girls. I haven't had sex for like three days!"

"And that's a huge achievement for you, definitely you horny bastard," James sniggered. "But I don't particularly want the girls to come."

"Oh no," Sirius said, his grin faltering. "Don't tell me you've turned into a faggot now."

"No, no way you fucking dick cheese," James said in disgust. "It's just I had a bad encounter with Evans today. She was calling me all these bullshit names and shit."

"Aw, did wittle Lily Evans call poor Jamsey poo mean names, did she?" Sirius said mockingly. "Did poor Jamsey cwy?"

"No of course not you fuckhead. I just never had a girl stand up to me like that," James said. "I'm just scared that if I see her I'll throw her down on my bed and start fucking her brains out to shut her up."

"And people say you don't have respect for women," Remus said sarcastically.

"That girl needs a dick inside her as soon as possible," Sirius said firmly. "I'll do the honours if no one else will."

"What?" James asked.

"What? She may be a bitch, but she's fucking hot," Sirius said in confusion.

"I doubt she would fuck any of us. She made her opinions pretty clear when she was going off at me today," James said.

"Well should we prank her?" Sirius said. "Teach her a lesson for disrespecting you."

"Nah I say just leave it alone. I'm over it," James replied.

"That's soft man," Sirius murmured, grabbing the bottle off of Remus a sculling it until only a small portion was left.

"Oh that reminds me!" Remus said suddenly. "I have our next target."

"Who?" James and Sirius in unison. Peter stared at Remus excitedly.

"You remember that day you were up here sick and missed your lessons?" Remus asked James.

"Yeah," James said.

"And you know how we got those essays for Potions back and you had forgotten to write your name on yours, so somebody went up at the end of the lesson and took credit for it."

"You found out who it was?" James said eagerly.

"Yeah, Jacob Collins, that Ravenclaw guy. His friend Rueben told me today," Remus smirked.

"Oh fuck yes. We are going to get him hard," James said. "I spent two days writing a completely different essay and it didn't even count because it was late. How are we going to get him?"

"Isn't he going out with one of our Gryffindor chicks?" Sirius asked. "Gina Spalding?"

"That's right," James said excitedly. "Oh I am so going to get that fucker back."

"Well if the plan involves sex with Gina, then I'm in," Sirius said.

"I can't believe he was stupid enough to take credit for James' essay," Peter said.

"He didn't know at the time who's essay it was," Remus said.

"Doesn't worry me," James said with relish. "Should've done the essay himself. Aren't Ravenclaws supposed to be smart?"

"You do realise if you screw up his relationship with Gina, Evans will hate you even more."

"Fuck Evans. She doesn't control my fucking life. She may be the hottest girl I've ever hated, but that's exactly the point, I hate her," James said. "Besides what Evans doesn't know won't hurt her."

* * *

_Yay finished the first chapter…yepp a lot happened and it was very long but I hope you enjoyed it anyway…_

_As you can see Lily hates James and well James doesn't hate Lily like he says he does, but he also isn't obsessed with her… yet_

_So please review and motivate me to write the next chapter_

_Oh and P.S chimaera eggs are the equivalent of cocaine in this story …) _


	3. Chapter 2: Teenage turmoil

The Chronicles of two teenage pranksters 

**Disclaimer:** _I don't own anything Harry Potter._

**Reviewers:** _Thanks so much ) … I'm glad you enjoy this story. It hasn't even got into the main plot yet but it should very soon… so keep reading because it gets very interesting... and Lily's not going to take James's crap don't worry_

_Enjoy ) …_

* * *

Two days following the shocking exposure of Miss Marsdon, a trio of girls lay sprawled under their snug, scarlet blankets, enjoying a comfortable sleep in before their tedious lessons. Lily Evans, among these girls, let out a yawn as she nuzzled into her fluffy pillow; her red locks were scattered across her pretty face. The dormitory door suddenly creaked open, causing the girls to stir. Lily's friend Krystal propped herself up on one of her elbows, her tired eyes squinting at the threshold, from which another two girls were tiptoeing. One had dark skin and eyes blacker than charcoal. Her long, dark brown hair was completely straight and fell down to her lower back. The girl's figure was very petite, standing at 5'3. Her friend stood taller at 5'7 and had a more voluptuous shape. Her hair in contrast was an ashy blonde color, which extended to the base of her neck. She also had a fair complexion and very pale blue eyes, which stared apologetically at the awakening girls.

Lily's friend Gina groaned, looking irritated. Her disheveled head turned to the clock on her bedside table.

"It's only seven o'clock," she stated to the girls in frustration. "What are you two doing up?"

"Sorry we woke you," the blonde whispered regretfully. "We're going to have a quick shower before breakfast, we just forgot our towels."

She quickly walked to her trunk and removed two fluffy pink towels.

Gina sighed, rubbing weary her eyes. "It's okay, Michelle. I still can't see how you two can get up so early."

The girl named Michelle smiled. "Do any of you guys need a shower?"

"No," Krystal and Gina replied simultaneously, as Lily merely shook her head, looking exhausted. Michelle's friend just gave the girls a cynical look.

"Alright then, we'd better go or we'll miss Breakfast," Michelle smiled, as her and her friend exited the dormitory and made their way up the spiral staircase to the bathrooms.

"Stupid whores," Gina grumbled, sliding from her bed.

Lily gasped. "Gina! You're such a bitch."

"As if I am, have you noticed the way Shanae looks at us, like she is king shit," Gina replied.

"Shanae may act like that, but Michelle's not bad," Krystal said reasonably.

"Yeah, I reckon Michelle is a bit two faced though," Gina said stubbornly, as she began rummaging through her cluttered trunk.

Lily let out a wide yawn, and stretched her arms high above her head. She then let out a sigh. "I'm so tired, I stayed up till one last night doing all that stupid homework."

"Why? Its due next week," Gina said skeptically.

"You know I like to keep on top of things," Lily shrugged. "At least I'm up to date."

Gina rolled her eyes. "You look like a zombie with those bags under your eyes."

"They aren't that bad are they Krystal?" Lily asked, turning to her other friend.

Krystal shook her head, "nah they're fine. Gina's just angry because she looks like a rabid dog when she wakes up."

Gina jaw dropped in mock offence. "Fuck off. Consider yourself lucky that I'm really, _really_ tired and can't think of a come back. Anyway what do we have first for the day bitches?"

"You and I have divination," Krystal replied, as she checked upon a square sheet of paper from her school robes.

"Good that means a break," Lily sighed in relief.

"Going to catch up on some sleep?" Gina asked, as she pulled her creased robes and the attire students were obligated to wear underneath.

"Nah, I usually hang out with Rueben during free periods," Lily replied.

"Ahh…" Gina smirked. "I don't see why you two don't start going out already."

"What?" Lily snapped defensively. "How many times do I have to tell you, Rueben and I are just friends. We tried the whole dating thing a couple of years ago and realized its much better if our relationship's strictly platonic."

"Ha, platonic my ass!" Gina yelled triumphantly. "You totally fucked him!"

"SHH!! Don't say it so fucking loud!" Lily whispered hysterically.

"Oh please, everybody already knows," Gina sniggered.

"Look, can you stop bringing that shit up. It was a one night thing, we were both totally off our faces, and it didn't mean anything," Lily said angrily. "And it just goes to show how strong our friendship is; the fact that we can still talk like we used to, without it getting awkward."

"Yeah, because you both want to do it again," Gina teased.

Lily let out a very loud huff in response, as she wrenched her trunk open, took out her uniform and jerked the hangings around her bed shut, starting to undress.

"Aw c'mon Lily I was just kidding," Gina smirked. "Why do you have to be so fucking uptight about it?"

"I'm not fucking uptight," Lily said crossly.

"Well, if you're going to be fucking anything, you should be fucking Rueben," Gina joked.

"Fuck off!" Lily yelled.

"Can we please stop saying the word fuck?" Krystal asked exasperatedly.

Gina rolled her eyes at her best friends prim take on their morning conversations. Lily yanked the hangings open and came out fully donned in her uniform.

"I think Krystal's right," Lily said grumpily, shooting daggers at Gina. "You should really stop swearing."

"Excuse me!?" Gina said mockingly, her smile withstanding Lily's fuming glare. "I believe there were two people here ruining Krys' morning."

"Whatever, I'll meet you guys at breakfast," Lily stated coldly, before departing from the dormitory.

"Aw c'mon Lily," Gina called impatiently. She received no response as Lily hastened to breakfast unaccompanied.

* * *

The cool morning breeze streamed through Lily's lengthy locks, causing them to softly clout against her face. In one swift motion she pulled her fly away hair back into an untidy ponytail. Her good friend Rueben was staring at her in amusement.

"So what's wrong Lily?" He asked as they progressed down the sloping lawns.

"Nothing I'm fine, don't I look fine?" Lily smiled.

"Of course you do. But I can always tell when something's up," Rueben said. "You weren't sitting with your friends at breakfast for one."

"Well I'm kind of in a shitty mood because I am sleep deprived," Lily informed him. "And we got into an argument this morning."

"Oh really, what about?" Rueben asked in concern. "Was it bad?"

"Hmm, not really, I'm just pissed at Gina that's all," Lily shrugged.

"Are you going to tell me what it was about?"

Lily sighed. "You and me. Trying to fathom why we aren't a couple and she kind of brought up last year when… you know, that night we were both like totally drunk."

Rueben smirked. "Oh yes, how could I forget? And Gina brought it up? Oh well, it's not such a big deal, we trust each other right?"

Lily gave a slight smile. "Yes."

"And we feel comfortable around each other right?"

"Yes…"

"And you explained to her it was just a one night thing and we are just friends right?" Rueben asked slyly.

"Yeah I did," she nodded.

"Well then, she'll just have to get over it won't she?" Rueben smirked. "You don't have to get upset when people mention it. Especially not Gina, think of all the mistakes she's made."

"Yeah I know, but I'm too good a friend to bring all that crap up, especially now that she's with Jacob," Lily murmured.

"Yeah, and she'd better not play up on him either," Rueben said seriously.

"She won't play up on him," Lily assured him.

"Yeah, or she'd have me to answer to," Rueben said.

Lily laughed, as the two occupied a patch of lawn at the edge of the lake. "And what would you do Rueben?"

"Okay firstly I'd give her an earful of what I really think of her, and then I'd make sure she could never hurt him again," Rueben said assertively.

"You don't trust her at all do you?" Lily asked.

"Well, can you blame me?" Rueben asked. "He's my best friend, and she used to sleep with every Tom, Dick and Harry in this place."

"Can you stop being so judgmental," Lily said crossly. "She's trying to change."

"And yet she judges what we did?" Rueben asked with raised eyebrows.

"She's just kidding around," Lily said reasonably. "I just wish she would stop bringing it up."

"Trying to forget about it?" Rueben asked in concern.

"Kind of," Lily murmured. "But not because it was with you, just because I'm embarrassed about the way I acted that night. I mean, if I was going to get drunk and sleep with anyone I'm glad it was my best friend and not some sleazy prick I don't even like."

"Yep, you do some stupid shit when you're drunk Lily," Rueben smirked.

"I did do some stupid shit that night," Lily replied. "You."

Rueben snorted. He then added, "Well I don't regret it. Because it has proved to me just how strong our relationship is."

"True that," Lily nodded. She then gave him a tight hug. "Just out of curiosity was I good at it? I know it's a weird question but yeah, just wanted to know."

Rueben smiled as he placed his chin on her shoulder. "From what I can remember, you weren't good… you were great."

Lily laughed as she pulled away. "From what you can remember? I mustn't have been that memorable."

"Trust me, it's a huge achievement that I managed to remember you at all when I was that drunk."

At that moment, a tinkling laugh echoed through the grounds, prompting Rueben and Lily to turn their heads. James, Sirius, Remus, Shanae and Michelle were making their way down the sloping lawns of Hogwarts, towards a large, shady beech tree. Lily could tell from their small distance that Shanae and James were exchanging flirtations; she gently stroked his arm, he in response, jokingly put his arm around her shoulders and 'accidentally' grazed her left breast.

_Sleaze _Lily thought, rolling her eyes, despite the fact that Shanae didn't seem to mind in the slightest. She turned back to Rueben. "Anyway, where were we?"

"I think they're talking about us," Rueben murmured, ignoring Lily's enquiry.

"Who really cares, let 'em," Lily said indifferently.

"They're looking over here." Rueben said. "Sorry to say this, but I really hate those guys,"

"Why are you apologizing, you know I can't stand them either," Lily said. "Oh, and I forgot to tell you I got into a fight with James yesterday. Aren't you proud of me?"

"What?" Rueben snapped. "You got into a fight with him? H-how… I mean… how could you be so stupid?"

"Excuse me?" Lily said, firing up. "It wasn't my fault! _Look_, he tried to talk to me so I blew him off, then he wouldn't leave me alone so I told him what I really thought."

"Lily!" Rueben groaned. "Do you know what the guy's capable of? He fucking ruins lives! He humiliates anyone who just pisses him off, including girls. _Especially_ girls."

"Why is it such a big deal?" Lily asked in exasperation.

"Because Lily, I don't want to see you get hurt. Who knows, he might be planning something right now for you," Rueben said seriously.

"Okay now your just being paranoid," Lily said. "I mean sure he pranks people but everyone acts like his this big fucking god who smites anyone who annoys him."

"I just don't want you to get hurt," Rueben repeated. "You know some students are actually scared of him."

Lily let out a sigh of frustration and ascended from her patch of lawn. "And I didn't think you were one of them."

"I'm not scared of him, I'm just scared for you," Rueben murmured. "C'mon Lily just sit back down."

"Nah, I'm going back up to the castle to get ready for potions," Lily said. "I'll see you next period."

"Lily-"

"Oh and FYI I totally held my own," Lily said firmly. "I just figured hey, _somebody_ has to stand up to him, I mean that's the reason he has so much power, because people just let him walk all over them."

And with that Lily turned and stalked back up the lawns toward the castle, completely disregarding the stares of Rueben, and James following her.

* * *

Dense gray smog was cultivating in the dimly lit dungeon classroom, as students brewed their latest assessment: a concoction, which heals the skin after coming in contact with a corrosive magical substance. The potion was quite complicated, certainly up to N.E.W.T level. Very few in the class had completed it, and one of those few happened to be James Potter. He rose from his chair arrogantly and looked down at his friends bubbling cauldrons.

"Are any of you close to finishing?" He asked. "I'm going up to get my flask."

"Yeah, I'm almost finished get me one," Sirius stated.

"Me too," Remus said.

Peter however shook his head. "I think I skipped an ingredient."

James snickered before making his way sideways through the aisle of desks. As he reached the front of the classroom to procure a flask, a gravelly voice addressed him.

"Ah James m'boy, finished are we?" Professor Slughorn asked from behind the haze.

James was taken aback by the professors' sudden appearance, but quickly regained his composure. "Yes sir, am I the first?"

"Oh no, afraid not. Miss Evans and Miss Wells beat you to it, along with a couple of others."

James scowled (he hated being beaten). He then smiled, "Well looks like I'll have to work harder next time Professor."

"Not at all, not at all," Slughorn replied. "It's the quality of the potion that matters, not the time you took to make it. It's a great achievement that you managed to complete it in the time that you did."

"Thanks sir, but for me there's always room for improvement in every aspect of potion making," James said. "Time and quality included."

"Glad to see you're so enthusiastic Mr Potter," Slughorn said happily.

James gave a smirk, "Anyway, I'd better get this potion ready for marking."

"I'm sure you'll do excellent as always Mr Potter," Slughorn smiled.

"Thanks sir," James murmured, as he made his way up to his desk with three flasks.

He sat down and handed Sirius and Remus their flasks, and immediately began filling his own.

"Guys I was thinking," James started. "We'd better get cracking if we want to pull off this prank this Saturday."

"Actually James, only you want this prank to be pulled off this Saturday," Remus opposed. "I think we should take a break after the huge prank we pulled off a couple of days ago."

"I'm not waiting Remus, I just want to get that fucker back as soon as possible," James said firmly.

"Well what kind of prank did you have in mind at such short notice?" Remus asked skeptically.

"Maybe I could help by causing a bit of turmoil for his and Gina's relationship," Sirius suggested. "Break 'em up?"

"No because that would take time, which we don't have a lot of," James murmured.

Sirius shrugged. "Still couldn't hurt."

"You just want to fuck Gina, you couldn't give a shit about the prank," James pointed out.

"So, what's wrong with that?" Sirius sniggered.

"C'mon what are we doing, we need to get fucking organized," James said. "I say we humiliate him in front of the whole school somehow."

"We aren't sending another person to Azkaban this time," Remus said firmly.

"Especially not at such short notice," Peter said.

"I know we aren't sending him to Azkaban," James said impatiently. "But what are we going to do before my impulse to smash the asshole overcomes me."

The rest of the Marauders fell silent and shrugged. James put his face in his hands, trying to formulate some sort of plan in his mind. He was quite impatient when it came to his pranks, and also very ambitious. If he wanted to accomplish something within a set time limit, he'd utilize any means to achieve this feat. He always got what he wanted.

At that moment, before James' bad mood had worsened, Lily, Gina and Krystal reclaimed their seats in the row behind, discussing something of tremendous use to James.

"Jacob's planning some kind of surprise date for us this weekend," Gina said happily.

"Ooh, when did he say this?" Lily asked.

"At breakfast, which you would've known if you had been sitting with us."

"Well, I would've if you hadn't of brought up the Rueben thing," Lily said angrily.

Gina opened her mouth to retaliate, but Krystal intervened, "Just continue with the story Gina."

"Well, that's about it really," Gina continued with annoyance. "We're meeting in the Entrance Hall Saturday night."

"Well that should be fun," Lily stated, attempting to resume their friendly conversation.

"I hope so," Gina murmured. "At least better than last time. That boy needs a few lessons in romance."

Lily smirked. "I'm sure he isn't that bad."

"Oh please, remember that hideous necklace he got me for my birthday?" Gina asked.

"No," Lily said in confusion.

"That's because I never showed anyone," Gina said. "Too embarrassed."

Krystal laughed. "I remember the cockroach cluster he got you for Easter last year."

Gina grimaced. "Exactly my point."

"Oh well at least he makes you laugh," Lily said reasonably. "His a very good boyfriend."

"I know, I do love him," Gina sighed. "Anyway I don't know where we are going to go after the Entrance Hall."

"What time you meeting him?" Lily asked.

"Eight o'clock he reckons," Gina said.

"Well I'm excited for you," Lily said.

"Yes, you have to tell us all about it," Krystal said.

A smirk played across James's handsome face, making him look, if possible, more arrogant than usual.

"Did you just listen to that?" James whispered to his friends excitedly.

"Yes," Sirius replied. Both Remus and Peter nodded.

"The prank is definitely happening Saturday night, and in the perfect location too: the Entrance Hall. All students will be there to see the effects Sunday morning," James said with relish.

"And what do you think Gina's going to do when you turn up trying to prank her boyfriend?" Remus whispered.

"I dunno," James shrugged. "We'll figure that out later."

At that moment, the bell sounded for morning break.

Peter sighed as he stared down at his fruitless attempt at the potion. "I'll just hand in what I've got."

James smirked and turned to Sirius, "I guess it wouldn't hurt to cause a little trouble with the couple."

Sirius grinned. "So what do you want me to do?"

James glanced at the Gryffindor girls making their way down their aisle. "Quickly go meet her at the end of the row. I'll set it up."

Sirius hastened through between the two rows of chair. James slid his wand from his robe pocket and pointed it at Gina's feet. With a quick flick of his wand, Gina stumbled forwards, only to be caught in Sirius' awaiting arms. She gasped into his chest, incomprehensive as to what had happened.

"Whoa, are you okay?" Sirius chuckled.

"Uh y-yeah…" Gina mumbled in confusion. "Sorry."

"It's okay," Sirius said. "Just got to be more careful."

"Yeah thanks," Gina said stepping backwards, looking highly embarrassed. "I don't even know what I tripped on."

"Don't worry, a lot of girls tend to fall for me," Sirius grinned.

Gina snorted.

"Yeah I know, bad joke," Sirius smirked.

"No, your funny," Gina smiled.

Before Sirius could reply, the sound of someone clearing his throat resonated through the almost empty dungeon. Sirius turned around slowly, only to find himself face to face with a suspicious looking Rueben.

"I need to talk to Gina," He murmured.

"Well then talk to her," Sirius said nastily. Not wanting to make a scene in front of the girls, Sirius walked away.

Rueben quickly led Gina out of the classroom, a stern expression on his face.

Lily and Krystal exchanged raised eyebrows at the scenario they had just witnessed. They then proceeded out of the classroom.

* * *

Gina sat down next to her friends in the courtyard, looking livid.

"What happened?" Lily asked in concern.

"Your good friend Rueben just gave me an earful," Gina said furiously. "He basically implied I was a slut just because Sirius saved me from having my brains splattered across the dungeon floor."

"Gina, I'm sure he never meant to imply anything like that," Lily said.

"Don't stick up for him Lily I know he doesn't think I'm good enough for his best friend," Gina said, determined not to break down. "Now his going to feed some bullshit story to my boyfriend, who'll crack an absolute shit at me."

"Look I'll talk to Rueben," Lily said. "And tell him not to say anything to Jacob. Just in the meantime, stay away from Sirius."

"Okay, you're all acting as though I'm going behind Jacob's back with Sirius," Gina said in frustration. "All he did was stop me falling."

"I know that Gina, but it looked like he was hitting on you," Lily said. "You know how many girls who have boyfriends he's slept with?"

"Okay, I don't think you all realize this but I actually care very much for my boyfriend and would never do anything to hurt him!" Gina said angrily. "And just because you don't like the Marauders Lily, doesn't mean I can't feel grateful when one of them saves my life."

And with that Gina stormed from her seat.

"Saved your life? He stopped you from grazing you knee," Lily called incredulously. "Gina c'mon, you can't honestly trust a group that calls themselves 'the marauders', can you?"

The only response Lily received was a rude hand gesture, as Gina rounded the corner.

* * *

"Oi, Rueben! Rueben!" Lily called, chasing her friend into the Entrance Hall at the conclusion of dinner that night.

"What?" Rueben turned around, looking concerned.

"You don't have to look so worried, I'm fine," Lily said. "I just wanted to talk to you about this morning in potions, about how Sirius helped Gina out."

"Yeah…"

"Well I was just thinking that you may have been a bit harsh to her when you gave her that lecture," Lily said. "She seemed really upset during break."

"So?"

"So, I really wish you would start trusting her," Lily said in frustration. "She didn't do anything wrong."

"She was flirting with the dickhead," Rueben replied.

"I hope you didn't tell Jacob that," Lily said sternly.

"Might've mentioned it," Rueben shrugged. "Anyway I thought you were angry at me for this morning."

"I was- I mean I am," Lily said. "Look, I want you to go to Jacob and tell him that nothing happened, and Gina did not flirt with Sirius. Please?"

"He's my friend Lily and I'm just looking out for him," Rueben said.

"God Rueben that is such bullshit," Lily hissed. "You only did it because you want them to break up."

"I did not, I just think my friend has a right to know when his girlfriend is flirting with a marauder."

"I think he does too, but the fact of the matter is that she didn't do anything so can't you just cut her some slack please," Lily implored.

Rueben rolled his eyes. "Fine I'll tell Jacob that nothing happened. But if I see her talking to Sirius again she's gone alright?"

"Fine," Lily said. "Not that she will anyway."

The pair then began following the throng up the Grand Staircase, whilst at the same time the marauders exited the Great Hall.

"I really hate that guy," Sirius said through gritted teeth. "He's the one who interrupted me with Gina this morning."

"I gathered that from that little conversation we just heard," James said, as he watched Lily and Rueben climb the stairs.

"Nah fuck him," Sirius said angrily, extracting his wand and taking aim. The next moment, Rueben bag split at the seams and the contents spilled from it. Pages from books were scattered on the staircase. Inkbottles shattered and coated the rest of the matter, including Rueben and Lily's shoes.

"Shit!" Rueben hissed, bending over in an attempt to collect his things.

"Why are you such an idiot?" Remus asked distastefully.

"Can't help it sometimes," Sirius sniggered.

"That was fucking fantastic," James laughed, watching Lily magically pick up papers from the bottom of the stairs. The marauders made their way toward the stairs, James and Sirius leading the pack.

Lily, who had not noticed the approaching group, bent over to retrieve a stray piece of parchment. James upon passing the Head Girl, 'unintentionally' grazed her ass with his left hand. Lily automatically stood up, turning around to see what had touched her. She cringed upon seeing James.

"Touch me," she said menacingly, her voice barely a whisper. "And I swear to god you'll never be able to satisfy another one of your fuck buddies ever again."

"Too late," James mocked.

Lily scowled as she rushed up the stairs to meet Rueben. James smirked as he watched her.

"Lets go," she murmured.

Rueben twisted around and saw the marauders. He quickly summoned his remaining possessions with his wand and followed Lily up the stairs.

"Lucky," Sirius said. "I was about to set fire to his stuff."

"Don't you think we've got a little carried away with the way we treat people these days?" Remus asked. "I don't think we ever used to be _this_ bad."

"That's how we roll Remus," James said simply, watching the duo round the corner. "Plus he was an asshole to Sirius today, so we have every right to be an asshole back."

"Exactly," Sirius nodded.

* * *

That night in the girl's dormitory Krystal and Lily sat on the end of their friends bed attempting to reason with her.

"He's going to break up with me, I know it," Gina murmured.

"No he's not! Rueben already said he's going to talk to Jacob and take back what he said," Lily said reassuringly, putting her arm around her best friend.

"Yeah, and you know that Jacob loves you too much not to trust you," Krystal said consolingly. "Just forget about what Rueben thinks of you. Your Jacobs girlfriend and he will believe you."

"But Rueben's his best friend," Gina said looking lost. "And i know he'd believe any bullshit Rueben comes out with over anything i say."

"That's not true," Lily replied. "I talked to Rueben, I made sure that he was going to take back everything he said. Rueben listens to me okay, and I would'nt let him ruin yours and Jacobs relationship. You've just got to trust me."

Gina nodded, though she still looked quite nervous. "I think I might turn in, I'm so glad it's almost weekend. N.E.W.T year is such a bitch."

Lily and Krystal gave their friend a hug, before allowing her to hop under her blankets. They then bade goodnight to eachother.

* * *

James casually walked through the empty corridors that Friday morning, making his way to the boys' toilets from Arithmancy. The previous night had been devoted to contemplating the prank he so desperately wanted completed. True, it was ambitious and they had just sent someone to Azkaban two days prior, but James was well known for his ambition and impatience when it came to his favorite pastime.

As soon as James reached for the handle, the bathroom door opened and from it came none other than Lily's best friend Rueben. Rueben shot James an ominous look, before roughly pushing passed him. James, though unsurprised by the sudden hostility, was quite taken aback by his aggressive behavior. Before Rueben could walk away, James forcibly seized the top of his arm to stop him.

"Do you have a problem with me loser?" James asked boldly.

Rueben quickly jerked his arm from James' grasp. "I think everyone has a problem with you Potter, but because of those pussy pranks you hide behind everyone's too chicken shit to actually say anything."

James smirk faded. "You think I 'hide behind my pranks'? Fuck you can tell you and Evans hang out together. She actually said something similar a couple of days ago. You know I find it funny how you both are all of a sudden speaking up. It's pretty brave of you actually, considering you probably have guessed what happens when you cross me and my friends. Are you like trying to rally against me or some shit?"

"Nope," Rueben replied. "Your not worth our time. And speaking of Evan's, stay the fuck away from her. I don't care if you have duties together. I don't want you being smart and talking to her, provoking her or touching her, _at all_."

"And to think I actually took you for a pansy," James sniggered. "But what makes you think I'd touch Evans. Sure she's fucking hot and has an awesome body, but she's also a stuck up, uptight little smartass bitch."

"So in other words, she's not a slut," Rueben smiled. "You're so fucked up."

"At least I get laid," James said, as Rueben turned his back on him and started walking back to class. "Where are you going? I think you still should elaborate on the fact that I 'hide behind my pranks'."

"In other words your not man enough to actually confront the people who piss you off," Rueben retorted.

"Oh I could so easily prove you wrong right now," James said threateningly.

Rueben did not retaliate; he merely continued on down the corridor. James, contrary to Rueben's beliefs, _loved_ confrontation.

"C'mon you don't want me to show you how wrong your perception of me is?" James called, quickly following him. "Throw a punch at me and see what happens."

Rueben did not turn around.

"Oh I see, you're a lover not a fighter," James mocked. "You know how I know that? You're walking away from a chance of punching someone you hate and also the fact that you love little miss Evans."

Rueben stopped in his tracks, and twisted his head around to look at James, "I care very much about Lily. I don't love her. Not that you would know what love is."

"True," James nodded. "But the difference between me and you is the fact that I'm not in love and get to fuck as many different girls as I want and you're in love and you aren't getting any action whatsoever."

Rueben rolled his eyes and went back to distancing himself to James. This was not quite the reaction James had been hoping for.

"Can I ask you something?" James called as Rueben rounded the corner. "How does it feel to know that I could have Evans on her back on my mattress upstairs at any time I want?"

Upon hearing James' comment, Rueben backtracked.

"Lily would never fuck you," he said firmly.

"I disagree," James shrugged. "I could get _any_ girl I want, no matter how hard they are to crack. Just because it took you what was it? Six years to get in her pants, doesn't mean the rest of us are deficient in that department."

Rueben, with a grunt of frustration, strode forward and shoved James hard in the chest. James faltered backwards a few steps, but looked far from surprised by this action; it had been just the reaction he had hoped for. A smirk formed on his face. He then raised his closed fist and swung it hard at Rueben's face. It connected with its target, causing Rueben to stumble to the ground in pain. Clutching his left cheek, Rueben looked up as James towered over him.

"What's wrong you fucking pussy?" James asked. "Need your hot little friend to come fight your battles for you?"

Rueben out of spite, quickly spat on the hem of James' robes (something he instantly regretted. As soon as he attempted to lift himself from the ground, James kicked him hard in the stomach, completely winding him.

James bent over Rueben, looking menacing. His mouth hovered only inches from the winded Rueben's ear and whispered, "You're going to regret that you stupid fuck."

James then straightened up, gave Rueben one last kick in the ribs and strode back to class, leaving him to splutter on the ground.

* * *

_Anyway hope you enjoyed that chapter… You'll see how Lily and James clash some more soon enough lol...yepp James sure is an a-hole! lol_


	4. Chapter 3: Isolating your enemies

The Chronicles of two teenage pranksters

**Disclaimer:** _I don't own anything Harry Potter._

**Reviewers:** _Thanks so much =) … I'm glad you enjoy this story. It hasn't even got into the main plot yet but it should very soon… so keep reading because it gets very interesting... and Lily's not going to take James's crap don't worry_

_Yes James is an asshole, but just keep reading there's much more to come …_

* * *

_Enjoy =) …_

James watched his new target in the from afar as he sat in the Great Hall, conversing with the adorable red head Lily Evans. He'd heard of the lies and pathetic excuses Rueben had created for the injuries he sustained during their little confrontation and couldn't wait to show the entire school how truly weak he was. James had never been beaten in a fight, and would have loved for everyone in Hogwarts to know that he had taken down Lily's 'charming' best friend. Which is why he needed to pull of this prank. He had concocted a plan with many phases, and each one needed to run smoothly.

"So tonight's the moment of truth," James smiled, looking around at his fellow trouble-makers. "Everyone knows what they have to do?"

"Yes we do," Sirius said, looking disgruntled. "I still don't see why I can't just remain looking like myself in this divine plan."

"Really Sirius? You really can't see why my plan wouldn't work with you looking like yourself?" James asked with raised eyebrows.

"Okay I can, but it's still fucked up," Sirius retorted.

"Yes it is James," Remus agreed. "We've got a day to pull all of this off, how are we going to do this in time?"

"You two need faith like me and Peter," James said. "We sent a teacher to Azkaban for fuck sake."

"Exactly, this prank is easy as compared to what we pulled off the other day," Peter said.

"That's my boy Peter!" James said enthusiastically, clapping one hand on Peters back.

"I still say this is fucked up," Sirius murmured to Remus.

"I say it's pretty damn good considering I only thought of it last night," James smirked.

"And what are you going to do if everything doesn't go according to plan?" Remus asked.

James shifted in his seat to stare specifically at Remus. "Moony, everything is going to go according to plan. We're the Marauders, everyone fears us. We're notorious for executing our plans flawlessly. So stop worrying like a little pussy and do what i've told you to do. You're a Marauder so suck up any doubts you may have."

Remus stared begrudgingly back at James' words. Sometimes he hated being a Marauder ... but like a true marauder, he supported the prank with suppressed remorse and _without_ any further complaint.

* * *

**Phase 1**

_Knock. Knock. Knock._

"Come in," Slughorn called out, as he marked a mountain of third year potions essays.

James Potter slowly pushed the creaking door open and greeted his professor with a friendly smile.

"Ah, James my boy," Slughorn said excitedly. "What brings you here on a Saturday morning?"

"Actually professor I was wondering if you weren't too busy to discuss the essay we had to hand in last week?" James asked with innocent curiosity.

"Not at all, not at all," Slughorn smiled. "What about them?"

"Well I was just wondering what I missed in that essay to achieve an exceeds expectations rather than an outstanding?" James smiled, his cover as an eager intellectual fooling Slughorn successfully.

"Ah I see, let me go get your essay from my office and when I come back I'll go through it with you," the large professor nodded. "Wait here, I shan't be long."

"Yes sir," James replied, watching his teacher get up from his overloaded desk and exit the classroom.

As soon as the head boy was sure he was out of earshot he rushed from his chair and extracted four hip flasks from the pockets of his jeans. He reached a cauldron filled to the brim with a thick, brown, bubbly substance: Polyjuice potion. James then filled the flasks to their maximum capacity with the potion.

Slughorn soon returned with James' essay, and found the Head Boy eagerly awaiting the professor's arrival.

"Shall we get started then Mr Potter?" Slughorn asked politely.

"Absolutely sir," James murmured.

Fifteen minutes later James left the potions classroom with a triumphant smile across his face. Slughorn attributed this to having extended his potions knowledge, when in actuality James' triumph came from the completion of phase one of that nights prank. He just hoped the rest of the day ran as smoothly. But James had faith in his friends, and knew with their cunning (maybe not so much Peter's) they can pull off anything.

* * *

**Phase 2**

Meanwhile, Sirius was holding up his end of the prank as walked out into the light of the courtyard. He'd left the Marauders Map with the brains of the operation (James), which made his task extremely difficult as he had to manually search for his target. She was not in the Common Room or her dormitory, the Great Hall or the Library. He was resigned to the fact that his failure to find her may jeopardize the whole process, when suddenly he received a jolt of excitement having sighted his prey at last. The beautiful Gina was striding towards one of the castle doors, threatening to leave his range of vision. In a hurried fashion, Sirius called out her name.

"Gina!"

The young girl turned around with swift curiosity, smiling nervously upon seeing who the voice belonged to.

"Sirius?" Gina replied in confusion. "You called me?"

"Yeah I did," Sirius panted as he stopped in front of her. "I've been looking for you all morning, but thank god I've found you. I just wanted to apologize for the other day? I know it's a bit random but I've been feeling guilty about it for a couple of days, and just needed to talk to you."

"Gosh Sirius, what did you need to apologize for?" Gina asked sincerely. "You did nothing wrong."

"For that day in potions. I'm sorry if I got you in trouble with your boyfriend or anything like that. I didn't want to cause trouble for your relationship."

"What? Oh don't be silly!" Gina smiled. "All you did was stop me from hurting myself and Jacob should be happy about that."

"Well I can kind of see where he's coming from, you know by being angry and all" Sirius shrugged. "You are a beautiful girl, and I'd be very protective of you too."

Blushing wasn't Gina's style, but on this occasion, she couldn't help it. Sirius leant in. his small stubble grazing Gina's soft skin as he whispered in her ear, "I'll let you in on a little secret."

"What is that?" Gina breathed, as she felt a chill run down her spine.

"I _was _kind of flirting with you a bit," Sirius winked.

Gina smirked and was momentarily speechless. What could she say to that? She had a boyfriend, and yet she was completely attracted to this gorgeous young man. Sirius saved her a reply by quickly grazing the top of her head with his hand (unnoticably capturing a few stray hairs).

"What are you doing?" Gina asked in confusion.

"Oh there was just a bug in your hair," Sirius said. "But it's gone now."

Gina laughed. "Well I guess I owe you twice as much now for helping me."

Sirius winked, smiling slightly. "Hm, Well i guess that's two favours you owe me isn't it Gina."

"I guess so Sirius," Gina smirked, flirting back without any show of remorse. "What would you have me do to pay you back."

"Ahh, you'll have to leave that for me to ponder," Sirius answered, putting one of his strong hands on Gina's shoulder, and bringing it down her arm in a stroking fashion. He felt Gina tense up under his touch, and could tell she was loving every minute of his attention.

"Well Gina, this has been really great talking to you," Sirius said, backing away. "But I'd better head off. I hope you have a great night, I know I will."

"Oh okay, well I'll see you around Sirius," Gina called after the handsome boys retreating back.

Sirius smiled as he walked around the corner, knowing full well that Gina was lusting after him in the little encounter of theirs. With any luck, what he was about to do to her boyfriend would make her see that she should have a go with a real man, like Sirius.

* * *

**Phase 3**

Remus, proceeded to aid James' vendetta against anyone who crosses him, by doing what was planned for his. Despite being disgruntled about James' fanatical determination to complete the plan that night, he still approached Lily Evans in the Gryffindor common room, as she sat on a table quietly completing her homework. As he got near her he was relieved to see that a couple of pieces of hair had fallen onto her shirt from her ponytail. He slyly picked them off and sat adjacent to the studious girl.

Lily looked up at the smiling Remus. "Uh hello Remus?"

"Hey Lily," Remus smiled. "You don't mind me sitting here do you?"

"Of course not," Lily said, shaking her head. "Wait. Unless you have some of your little friends meeting you?"

"Nope all alone," Remus assured her.

"Well then you're more than welcome," Lily smiled.

Remus smiled back. "So I see your working on that charms essay everyone was moaning about."

"Yeah it wasn't hard at all I don't know what everyone was whining about," Lily said. "I'm just finishing up the conclusion now."

"Can I read it?" Remus asked. "I'm not going to copy I've already finished mine. You can check if you want?"

Lily smirked and passed the essay to the polite young man. "Remus, I trust you I could probably use some of your expertise."

Remus took the essay and began reading. Lily was a very articulate and brilliant student, as he could tell by her essay. Before long, however, he found what he was looking for and the real reason he had wanted to read her essay: a spelling mistake. He took his wand and tapped the paper, which absorbed the mismatched letters from the page.

"Uh Remus, what are you doing?" Lily asked suspiciously.

"Oh you spelled the word equilibrium wrong, you'll just have to fix it up," Remus said politely pointing to the edited space on the page.

"Oh my, Remus, what an attentive proof-reader you are," Lily smirked, rewriting the word. She then quickly finished of the essay with her tidy scrawl, and placed it aside as she looked curiously at Remus.

"So did you just come over here to check out my essay, does that kind of stuff get you going or something?" Lily joked.

Remus smiled. "Um no, I guess I just thought you could use some company. I mean I've always got along with you Lily, and you know I've missed talking to you."

Lily smiled broadly at these words. She had a bright, beautiful smile. "Remus, I totally agree, it's always great talking to you but I mean, where are your friends. I thought you guys were like inseparable."

"Oh god no, sometimes I just need a break from them you know. Even though we're friends, I have very different interests from them," Remus replied.

"I realised that you know, you just seem to be a kind of outsider in that group you know. Like please don't take that offensively because I don't mean it insultingly at all, it's just you seem alot less cruel then James and Sirius. And Peter just seems to want to do what the others tell him to. But your different," Lily said honestly. "Like an outcast, I like it."

Remus laughed. "You like me being the weirdo of the group do you. Does that mean you aren't afraid of me?"

"Please Remus, I'm not afraid of any of your group," Lily said firmly.

"Would you ever cross James though, after you've heard what his done," Remus enquired.

"You mean aside from tonnes of girls, the pranks his pulled?" Lily questioned. "I mean I don't think I'd ever willingly get in his way if it came to it, but that doesn't mean I'm just going to lay flat and let him walk over me. It's not my style. Like the other day for instance I told him what I really think of him."

"Yeah I heard about that, he didn't take too kindly to it," Remus smirked, at the memory of his friends rant.

"Oh yeah what did he say?"

"Alot of stuff," Remus muttered. "But he's not going to do anything to you. I swear he as the biggest soft spot for you. Anyone else who would've stood up to him, he would've made sure they went back to being intimidated by him, but you he kind of left alone."

"Pfft maybe he's scared of me," Lily joked, causing Remus to laugh.

"Maybe, or maybe he just wants you."

"Oh c'mon Remus he wants everything. He'd fuck a tree if it had a tight enough hole."

Remus snorted at these words. "I think you've got him confused with Sirius."

Remus found Lily to be hilarious and for another half-an-hour, they sat in that chair conversing about family, school and reasons why a nice guy like Remus managed to become friends with such a destructive group. As the conversation progressed, Remus became increasingly guilty about the real motivation behind him sitting with this gorgeous, sweet girl, and decided to remove himself from the situation.

"Listen Lily, it's been really great catching up with you, but I have some things to do," Remus said, not completely abandoning the plan. "Did you want to continue this conversation tonight?"

"Oh um sure, we can hang out. Oh wait, I'm supposed to be hanging out with Krystal tonight while Gina's with her boyfriend," Lily said. "Oh but I mean, not that you'd want to hang with two girls, but it might be cool if you come hang out with us as well. But, aren't you with James and Sirius tonight?"

"James, Sirius and Peter are off doing things I'm not particularly interested in," Remus admitted. "So to come and make friends with you girls would be a fairly nice change. You sure it won't be weird me coming and hanging out with you?"

"Not at all," Lily said, once again flashing her beautiful smile.

"Okay great, so how about we meet in the library and go from there, we could go up to the astronomy tower and have a nice relaxing chat under the stars."

"Wow Remus," Lily laughed. "You sure know how to show two girls a good time. You know what Remus, I thought your friends would completely have changed you but you're still one of the sweetest guys I've ever met. Can't wait till tonight!"

Remus didn't know what to say to Lily's words, so instead he waved and exited the portrait hole. Good thing too, he was very close to divulging the night's plans out of remorse, and would have to suffer the wrath of James. Not a good thing to deal with.

Remus had what he needed and rushed to the owlery. He picked out a tawny colored owl and grabbed a piece of parchment and his wand. He tapped the paper with his wand, which regurgitated Lily's neat, cursive writing onto the page, creating a small letter addressed to _Rueben_.

_Hey Rueben i_

_Meet me on the first floor tonight near that thousand year old mirror. I really want to talk to you._

_Please come ... for me_

_Love Lily._

Remus tied the letter to the owl's leg and sent it on its way, half hoping that the plan would not work out.

* * *

**Phase 4**

The four marauders met up late that afternoon in the boy's dormitory to initiate the plan. On James' lap was the marauders map, in order to check where important people were situated, to ensure that noone would unexpectedly meet in the castly. This would surely foil James' perfectly thought out plan. On the floor next to him were some females' clothes and underwear he had summoned from the girls dormitory (typically, he had picked some revealing items).

"Alright so the cock sucker Rueben is in his common room with Jacob, and pretty Lily and her friends are in the Great Hall," James said with satisfaction. "Sirius and Remus and Peter you all know what you have to do. And remember, timing is crucial. Any fuck ups and I'm going to kick your asses, understand."

Everyone in the room nodded, Remus with lack of enthusiasm. James handed Sirius a flask, filled with the polyjuice potion he had stolen earlier that day.

"Alright Sirius you've added the hairs?" James asked.

"Sure have," Sirius smirked.

"Alright well there's nothing else for it," James said. "Cheers."

And with that both Sirius and James took a swig from their respective flasks. After a few moments of anticipation, James' and Sirius' bodies lurched foward, as their transformations into the opposite sex began. A strange sensation flooded through their bodies and before Remus' and Peter's eyes, their appearances began to alter.

These built and strong boys experienced shrinking musculature, their normally broad chest lost width and they slowly grew breasts. Thier normally muscular arms shrank Their hands and feet were now petite and their features much softer. Their hair changed colour and any stubble they had on their faces had disappeared. Their manhoods had completely disappeared and were replaced with female parts. They had transformed into two exceedingly beautiful Gryffindor girls. Sirius was now Gina and James had become Lily.

The two boys rushed to the mirror in their currently baggy clothes and marveled at their appearance. He saw himself as Lily in his baggy t-shirt, and quickly envisioned it being the morning after a night of hot, passionate sex with James, where Lily had donned James' clothes for bed. He found this though incredibly arousing.

Sirius on the other hand looked at his olive complexion (not much difference from his own skin tone) and slid his fingers through the straight raven locks. He couldn't believe what he was looking at with his new, startling electric blue eyes. He could see that Gina still looked amazing even in male clothing.

James was right beside him, relishing the fact that he could now see Lily naked without anyone's protest. Of course with the plan needing to be executed within the next few hours, he refrained from rushing to the bathroom and exploring his temporary body. Even though she had a bitchy attitude and walked around like little dick tease, he had to admit she was absolutely gorgeous. So unique with her bright green eyes, and dark auburn hair teamed with completely flawless, translucent skin. He would be very lucky to have a go with her, if she ever removed that metal rod from her tight ass.

"Well boys," James (or should we say Lily) said with his new husky voice. "Let's get this show on the road."

"Wait dude, give me time to just say that you have never looked more attractive to me," Sirius (Gina) said in awe.

"I could say the same for you Sirius," James (as Lily) smirked. "But right now our clothes are hanging off us and our tits are unsupported. I think we need to opt for some more _revealing _clothes."

"I couldn't agree more my friend," Sirius scoffed.

As Remus stood by watching his friends disrespect these girls' bodies, he felt he should at least make sure a certain amount of dignity should be retained. He had a very high amount of respect for these girls, particularly Lily.

"I know a spell that can switch the clothes you got from the girl's dormitory with the ones you have on now," Remus said.

"Thanks for the offer and all Remus but I think we'll stick to the old fashioned way and just undress ourselves and look at our bodies in the mirror for a while," Sirius said, giving Gina's breasts a squeeze with his newly feminine hands.

Remus found it difficult to believe he could find it so easy to defy Sirius and James, especially looking like they did at that moment. Peter on the other hand couldn't peel his eyes away from the two 'girls'.

"Listen Sirius I think you've done enough to these girls, so I'm going to perform this switching spell and swap your boys clothes for proper _girls _clothes _without_ you checking out the girls' bodies," Remus said resolutely.

"But …"

"Remus is right Sirius," The Lily-look-alike, James stated. "We've gotta stop dicking around."

"Are you gay?" Sirius asked. "Seriously this is Lily and Gina we're talking about."

"I don't care we need to get this done," James said, surprised by his own willpower. "Anyway Remus perform the spell."

After performing the incantation, a resonating pop filled the room, as Sirius (in Gina's body) and James (in Lily's body) had been instantly redressed. Sirius was now wearing a black low-cut satin dress and with black strappy heels, while James was in a green tank top and white shorts, just covering James' (Lily's) perky ass.

"Much better," Sirius smirked.

"Alright, let's go humiliate these fuckers," James said evilly, despite his innocent exterior. "And just remembers to keep you flask under that dress of yours, to sip at all times."

"Yes mum," Sirius replied.

* * *

**The execution**

"Okay girls, how do I look?" Gina asked, stepping out from behind her crimson hangings to reveal her outfit.

"You look gorgeous," Krystal said with a smile.

Gina had donned a white strapless babydoll dress for the occasion and had pulled her dark hair into a high messy ponytail, showing off her beautiful tanned face. With her natural good looks Gina did not need very much make up at all. She had absolutely no idea that a replicate of herself would be wandering around the castle posing as her that night.

"You look great Gina, but that's not saying much considering you always look good," Lily said, leaning casually on her four-poster bed wearing a tight fitted electric blue t-shirt with her favorite band on it and black shorts.

"I'm liking these compliments girl's, keep 'em up," Gina laughed.

"We would but it's just about time for us go," Krystal said in her pink singlet and white denim skirt. "Lily said we'd meet Remus soon."

"Yeah I still can't believe you guys are meeting up with Remus," Gina said skeptically. "I mean c'mon, you hate the marauders Lily."

"I don't count Remus as a marauder Gina," Lily murmured. "He is a genuinely nice guy and I don't think he has much to do with their stupid pranks. Unlike Sirius, the guy you admitted to flirting with today."

"Hey I told you, I didn't want to flirt back but Sirius is just so god damn sexy, even you two have to admit that," Gina shrugged. "Anyway I'm going to head off to my hot date."

"You're such a slut Gina, fantasising about Sirius then rushing off to have sex with your boyfriend," Krystal smirked.

"Hey I resent that Krystal, me and my boyfriend aren't just going to have sex," Gina stated. "We'll need to eat as well!"

"Well I hope you guys have fun having sex and eating," Lily smirked. "This date is soo much different to what activities you usually get up to."

Gina laughed at Lily's words. "I'll catch you girls later."

Gina then exited the dormitory and then the portrait hole, eager for her night to begin. She felt confident and beautiful, as always even though she had no idea what Jacob had in store for her. Whatever it was she was sure it wasn't going to be exciting or original by any means. After all Jacob was slightly ... 'romantically challenged'. Not that she cared, as long as he had a big dick, and knew what to do with it.

As she made her way through the various corridors, she couldn't help but feel as though she was being followed. However, no matter how many times she turned around she couldn't seem to catch anyone. Finally she reached a corridor on the fourth floor with many tapestries hanging from the wall, thinking she was just being paranoid. She continued her journey down to the entrance hall, but was suddenly interrupted by a voice behind her.

"Hey."

Gina spun around, to see Peter Pettigrew standing behind her, looking anxious. This was the last person she'd expect to be following her.

"Peter right?" Gina asked suspiciously.

"Um, yeah," Peter replied nervously.

"Are you talking to me?"

"Well yeah, I just need you to look at something for me," Peter said. "I mean noone else is around so I was wondering if you could help me?"

Gina thought this was an odd request, considering she'd never spoken to Peter in her life. "Okay … but can we make this quick, I'm kind of in a hurry."

"Yeah sure it's just something on my arm. I've had it for like an hour, can you come check it out?"

_Gross, _Gina thought. "Alright Pettigrew, that's a bit weird but whatever I'll have a look for you."

Gina slowly approached Peter as he rolled up the sleeve of his sweater. Gina looked down at his arm, expecting to see some kind of burn or growth. Instead all she saw was a scrunched up cloth in his balled fist.

"What is that in your hand?" Gina asked, as a strong smell reached her nostrils.

"Just a cloth," Peter shrugged, before forcing it to her mouth.

Gina let out a muffled squeal before being forced against the brick wall. Gina tried to struggle against Peter, but her efforts were futile. Whatever substance was on the cloth was quickly subduing her. Before long the pretty girl was completely knocked out, sliding slowly down the wall, into Peter's squat shadow.

Peter dragged Gina's unconscious form behind one of the tapestries, where there was a small gap for suits of armor to be displayed. He left her there and quickly fled the scene, panting and sweating like a pig.

* * *

Lily, Krystal and Remus made there way upwards (opposite to Gina) and finally reached the astronomy tower. Having walked all the way from the library the girls quickly found out that Remus was a perfect gentleman and easy to get along with. When they entered the large room and sat down they were very contented to find it was a beautiful starry night.

"Shall we sit down then ladies," Remus asked.

"Yes we shall Remus," Lily replied, Krystal giggled. The trio sat on the cold pavement and glanced up in intervals at the magical sky.

"So Remus," Lily said after a few moments. "Any real reasons you're hanging with us and not your little friends tonight?"

"I told you I just needed a nice change," Remus muttered. "And they're doing things I'm not interested in doing."

"Like pranking people," Lily huffed. "Who've they got it in for now."

"They've got it in for anyone who's not a Marauder Lily, or considered to be one of our 'external' friends," Remus replied.

"External friends," Krystal snorted. "Well one things for sure, if they are pranking tonight, I would not like to be one of those poor people."

"C'mon if it were me they were targeting wouldn't you notice the signs it's not like they can just prank without anyone knowing," Lily murmured.

"One thing you've got to realise Lily, is that James carefully articulates his plans," Remus muttered. "He has the right tools and perfect timing to pull his pranks off exactly the way he needs them to be."

"With yours, Sirius' and Peters help of course," Lily said. "He can't of sent a teacher to Azkaban without your help either."

"Well no, but who says that was us," Remus smiled mysteriously.

"It was so obvious you had something to do with it," Lily replied.

"But Lily Dumbledore doesn't seem to think so," Krystal said reasonably.

"Well Lily is kind of right Krystal, I mean James makes friends with people he needs to make friends with and charms people he needs to charm," Remus said. "It's all part of his plan to live an existence where everyone basically idolizes him."

"One day someones going to drag him and his ego down," Lily said. "And I'm going to congratulate whoever has the skills to do that."

"Yes well, good luck to whoever that is," Remus scoffed.

As the night progressed, Remus' guilt increased, knowing what his friends were doing at this very moment and that these girls did not deserve the shock they were going to face. The girls seemed to really like Remus, and were completely unaware of what had happened to their best friend.

* * *

Sirius (in Gina's body) walked down to the entrance hall, feeling extremely strange and hating the fact that a lot of males were checking him out along the way. If he had his way, all of those perverts would be knocked out (even though he'd probably be doing the same thing). Sirius (as Gina) finally reached the hall, and was shockingly happy to see Jacob, the one boy he actually wanted to see.

"Hey babe," Jacob said, looking Sirius up and down. "You look great, very sexy. C'mere."

Jacob lent in to kiss Sirius' (or Gina's) lips. Sirius however retched and backed away. No way was he kissing a dude. No matter how much he looked like a girl, it was still incredibly gay.

"What is it?" Jacob asked with confusion, running his hands through his extremely short hair. "Don't you like my kisses, gorgeous?"

"Uh I guess, but I mean, don't you wanna save that stuff for later?" Sirius asked awkwardly.

"Ah I see, alright I can save my moves for later baby," Jacob winked, as he grabbed Sirius' hand and walked him out into Hogwarts' grounds. "I suppose you just can't wait for what I've prepared for us. It's definitely going to change your mind about me being 'romantically deficient' or whatever."

"Right oh then," Sirius said under his girly breath, looking forward to pranking the sleazy guy. "Dopey bastard."

"What was that babe?" Jacob asked, as they walked down Hogwart's grassy slopes.

"Nothing, nothing," Sirius quickly replied. "So what are we doing?"

"You'll see," Jacob smirked, giving Sirius a quick squeeze on the ass, to which he almost vomited. _Fuck I feel so gay right now._

Jacob led his 'girlfriend' down to the edge of the lake, where he had prepared a small picnic equipped with a rug and a box of sandwiches. Jacob looked expectantly at Sirius, thinking his girlfriend would be appreciative of all his efforts to impress her.

"Think of this as an I'm sorry for not trusting you this week," Jacob murmured genuinely. "Especially when it's that prick Sirius' fault. So what do you think? Pretty _romantic_ huh?"

"He isn't a prick," Sirius said aggressively.

"Sirius? Yes he is," Jacob said in confusion. "He was flirting with my girlfriend of course his a prick. His lucky I didn't catch him that day coz I would've ripped him apart."

Sirius laughed. "You fuckin' wish you piss weak piece of shit! Sirius would've whipped your shit hole."

"What the fuck has gotten into you tonight babe," Jacob asked angrily. "Your acting like a complete bitch. How dare you think a guy like Sirius could possibly kick my ass."

Sirius laughed, "How dare you think you could possibly bash Sirius. You're going to fucking get it tonight, you just wait."

"Get what?" Jacob asked. "Look baby I prepared this date for us, lets not fight. Sit down with me and eat."

Sirius laughed, "No thanks. I know you tried to be romantic but fuck who takes their girlfriend to a picnic these days. You're a fucking pussy. I'm leaving."

Sirius started storming to the castle, and to his great triumph Jacob began to follow, looking simultaneously confused and furious.

"Gina what the fuck?" Jacob yelled. "You're the one that's been bitching that I need to be more romantic, that I need to do something outside my comfort zone for you. And then I do this for you! What is wrong with you?"

"Well Jacon you see, a picnic doesn't change the fact that you're dumb as fuck!" Sirius called back with amusement.

Sirius stormed through the front door and to the corner of the entrance hall, away from the prying eyes of a few students that were there. Jacob chased her, red in the face.

"Gina stop walking away from me and tell me why you're acting like this?" Jacob said. "There's no reason for you to fly off the handle at me!"

"You're right theres no point in me teasing you, as entertaining as it is," Sirius agreed, drawing his wand with Gina's manicured hand from under her skirt. "I'll cut to the chase."

"Babe?" Jacob asked, wondering what she was about to do.

With a swift flick of a wand, and a silent incantation Jacob was confunded and fell to the ground. Sirius smirked at his success, as he watched Jacob in his stupor.

"Get ready to be completely humiliated and lose your 'babe' on the same day," Sirius smirked, while using all the strength Gina's feminine body could muster and dragging a confused Jacob to the nearest broom cupboard. Inside he found Peter, obediently waiting for him.

"Wormtail," Sirius nodded. "Now we just have to wait for James."

* * *

James couldn't stop staring at himself in a small ancient mirror on the wall on the first floor. Lily Evans was a stunner, but a guy like James would never admit that of the girl who thought she was so much better than him. In fact, he thought of getting her back for defying him, by pleasuring himself (or Lily's body) in the middle of the corridor for everyone to see. _That would be an excellent show, _James thought as he observed Lily's gorgeous face. _The prude wouldn't know what the fuck happened._

At that moment, James' pondering was cut short as he heard lone footsteps approaching which could only mean one thing: Remus' fake letter from Lily had been successful and Rueben had fallen for the bait.

Sure enough, moments later Rueben rounded the corner smiling as he saw 'Lily's' face.

"Lily!" Rueben said excitedly, opening his arms to give James a greeting hug. James stepped back in disgust.

"Hey Rueben, I was just thinking, you know this whole hugging thing, yeah you can just forget about that," Lily's husky tone omitted from James. "In fact, forget the hugging I don't even think it's a good idea if we see each other anymore."

Rueben's smile faltered slightly, but then he just laughed. "You wrote me to meet you here so we could see each other right now. Fuck you're a weird one."

James sighed. "You just don't get me. See the truth is, I think you're a complete pussy. I only wrote to you so I could say it to your face. See girls like me , pretty, however pretentious we may be deserve real men. Men who aren't complete faggots. Do you undertand what I am saying?"

"Lily, what?" Rueben said in confusion. "Is this just you trying to joke with me or what? I don't understand what you're trying to accomplish calling me a faggot. This is like you."

"I guess you could say someones helping me come to my senses. Basically I want your ass humiliated in front of the whole school, where you can't hide behind your lame excuses. I know where you got those bruises from," James smirked, using Lily's alluring lips. "James kicked your ass, and you didn't even have the decency, no wait, the _balls_ to own up to the fact that you got beaten by a real man, and now his going to get his revenge."

"This isn't Lily is it?" Rueben replied suspiciously. "James has done something to you."

"Not quite," James muttered, drawing his wand.

Rueben's reaction was slow, as he couldn't quite fathom what was going on, giving James time to confund him.

Rueben stood in a daze completely unaware of his surroundings. James laughed at his triumph and led the confunded young man downstairs into the entrance hall, without the prying eyes of any onlookers. He then reached the broom cupboard where Sirius was taking care of Jacob.

"I see the plan went well up your end," James grinned, flashing Lily's beautiful smile, as he observed the scene before him.

"Same with you," Sirius smirked, relishing the confunded look on Rueben's face.

The boys congratulated each other and laughed at how smoothly each phase of plan ran.

"Haha, see here we are in chick's bodies, doing the hard yards while Remus is talking to two good-looking girls," Sirius laughed.

"Yeah but at least we get to look at their tits," James said suggestively.

Peter looked on in awe, expecting Sirius and James to reveal their feminine bodies. However before they could do anything, their switch back was triggered as their bodies began broadening and bulging. The grotesque transformation led to the tight women's clothes they were wearing to tear. After a few moments of pain, the boys were back to normal, with taut female attire stretched across their muscular bodies.

"Let's get changed," James said uncomfortably, grabbing the clothes Peter had placed into the cupboard.

"Alright boys as soon as the coast is clear, lets finish this," James said eagerly.

* * *

**The Morning After**

The Marauders plan was a smooth success; as always.

The students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry were journeying to Sunday breakfast, expecting a relatively uneventful ordeal. All of them received a great surprise in the form of two manipulated men: Rueben and Jacob. They circled around the two boys to observe the results of the Marauder's night time endeavors, as the pranksters themselves basked in glory (except for the guilt-ridden Remus).

The two boys had been tied with rope to one of the staircase banisters. Jacob was forced onto his hands and knees whilst Rueben was tied behind him in a standing position, his crotch pressed against Jacobs's backside. Both had been stripped down to their briefs. They were both in very compromising positions, as the marauders had presented them as two gay men having intercourse, and the croud loved this sickening and humiliating sight.

The students pointed and laughed, some even ran to kick and touch these students. A small portion of the students took pity on the two, but knew not to do anything to tarnish the results of the marauders pranks. The Gryffindor girls finally made their way down the stairs (Gina having no recollection of the night before, walked in a daze). When the situation captured their attention. Both Lily and Gina screamed and attempted to help the still confunded friends. Gina burst into tears when she realized what her boyfriend had been subjected to, and remembered where she was supposed to be last night.

James, Sirius and Peter looked highly please and simultaneously amused by the scene. Lily looked up quickly and made eye contact with James, who responded with a wink. Lily couldn't believe a single group could cause so much mahem, and willingly hurt so many people. She severed the ropes of Rueben who collapsed, confused about where he was. Lily snapped from anger, and stormed at James.

* * *

_And that's the end of that chapter haha … now its going to get interesting …keep reading and REVIEW if you want me to continue._


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